The Babylon Bee has put together the following list to help laid-off IRS workers land on their feet:
- Pretty much any job at the DMV: Unpleasant government positions nobody in the general public wants to interact with? A natural fit.
- Mugger: Jumping out of a dark alley to demand all of someone’s money. Sounds about right.
- Fill-in host of CBS’s The Late Show: Wait, never mind.
- Proctologist: Another job that’s perfect for someone accustomed to probing people in the most uncomfortable and invasive ways possible.
- Middle management on the Death Star: A simple, lateral move from one evil empire to another.
- Summer spot on the host panel for ABC’s The View: Wait, never mind.
- Serial killer: A great job for someone who is used to having everyone mortally terrified at the mere mention of them.
- Goon for cartoonish supervillain: Most of Batman’s rogues’ gallery is probably in the market for mobs of henchmen.
- CIA interrogator: Waterboarding can’t be that much worse than being audited.
- Jehovah’s Witness missionary: IRS workers are well-suited for jobs that have them showing up unwanted on people’s doorsteps.
If you’re a former IRS employee, any one of the jobs listed above should be right up your alley. Have other positions you’d suggest for out-of-work IRS workers? Throw them in the comments below